Memoir Journal # 4

In the last part of the book, there is a deep atmosphere of sadness and loss. Carmen Bin Ladin knows she has lost any hope of Saudi Arabia becoming a more modern and accepting place. But also she has lost in her husband in a sense, because he ends up having an affair with some other women. She had put so much into the relationship, and in the end, didn't get much back. Her husband didn't really care for the kids, but also became a changed person, as times of crisis in his country came about. Carmen Bin Ladin had these hopes and dreams for her her life, for her education of her children, for the well-being of her country, and for her husband to toughen up more. But she hits a dramatic climax in the story where she realizes this can never happen in Saudi Arabia. She knew she had to get out of there, or nothing would change. Carmen and her husband ended up getting a seperation, and to this day, he does not talk to his daughters.

Carmen Bin Ladin becomes very weak (physically), during the time of her daughter's birth because she has so much going on like the pressure to sign prenuptial documents or else Yeslam would take away their daughter, and the stress of a lengthy divorce. She was trying to piece her family together by herself, but in the end, things didn't work out with her and Yeslam. Even though she became weak for awhile, she was still mentally strong, and had the will to make her daughter's lives successful. In the book she says, " I have come to believe that dealing with my unbelievably lengthy divorce is the price that I will have to pay for my daughters' freedom". Even though she got herself into a bad situation, she fought hard for custody of her kids, and the knowledge and respect they would learn in Geneva. Her strength is something for all women to look up to, especially those who feel suffocated and alone like in Saudi Arabia.